Saturday, September 20, 2008

I've Been Freakin' OUT lately.

I wish this school system didn't destroy me and others like me as much as I feel it has done. It really has dwindles my self-confidence which is what I wanted to gain most of all in high school. Who likes themselves in Middle school? I know I didn't. I never wanted that feeling again, but when I got to high school, at least for a while, not so much anymore, but still I felt WORSE! IT SHOULDN'T be like that! It makes me so angry what just six hours in seven different desks can do to my mind. Sometimes, I consider asking my parents for pills or something to take to help me feel better during the day. I shouldn't have to take something to make me feel confident just because I don't compare to anyone. I don't really want to, but sometimes I just feel so hopeless. The system is so corrupt. I don't want to become a carbon copy of everyone grand. Because no one is grand.

2 comments:

tayloralexandra said...

awww god I'm so sorry and I know what you mean. exactly. But hang in there because I swear you're so much better off without medicine. I promise I'm here for you and just try to keep your head above water if you need a break let me know, you can come here and we'll make art and have our own school dance. Oh, and you'll have to wear the disco ball shirt. of course

Anonymous said...

i love love love love the quote by Kimya Dawson on your page -- and by the way,i totally agree with that whole middle school into high school business.
"no one is grand". that's so beautiful -- i can't think of anything better to say, it's that good.
so my dear, i don't know what you think of me, but what i think of you is that you have so much in your brain that is honest and real, and i'm so glad to be able to read it all.
hope that makes a difference, maybe.